Your puppy's first night: not alone, but with a plan

Why shouldn't a puppy sleep alone on the first night?

Because everything is new and they have never slept without their litter. LICG points out that a puppy has only just left their mother and littermates, doesn't know their new home well yet and is still completely dependent on you. That is why their crate can stand in your bedroom at night at first.

Three UK animal welfare charities give similar advice: Dogs Trust, the PDSA, which also runs its own pet hospitals, and Woodgreen. The PDSA advises staying in the same room for the first few nights, so your puppy doesn't wake up in a panic because nobody is there. Sometimes you may even need to sleep with them until they're comfortable on their own.

The upside: you notice straight away when they need to go out. And with you close by, your puppy feels safer.

Where should a puppy sleep on the first night?

Close to you, with a plan for where they will sleep later. Dogs Trust describes two common ways. Both start with a safe, quiet place to sleep. The difference is who moves over the coming weeks: your puppy, or you. Choose beforehand which of the two you will follow, because the rest depends on it.

The PDSA also advises deciding beforehand where your puppy sleeps, and sticking to it from the first night. Not sure? Choose the spot you will still be happy with in a few months.

And in bed with you?

That's fine, as long as you'll still be happy with it later. 'Are they allowed on the bed?' is one of the house rules the PDSA says to settle before your puppy arrives, with everyone at home. Breaking a habit is much harder for a puppy than making a new one. If they won't be allowed in later, don't start.

Does a puppy need a crate on the first night?

Not if they don't know one yet. LICG says a crate has to be taught step by step as a pleasant, safe place; never just put a dog in one with the door shut. An open crate inside a puppy pen next to your bed works too.

• Not too big. Just big enough to stand, turn round and lie down in, with room for a water bowl. In a crate that's too big they might pee in one corner and sleep in another. If the crate is still too big, put a divider in for now.
• Soft and familiar. Soft bedding, a blanket that smells of you or their previous home, and for some puppies a soft toy to snuggle against.
• Not tucked away. So not in a cellar or shed, away from the family.
• No collar in the crate. It could get caught.

How do you prepare for the first evening?

With a calm evening that goes the same way every day. Woodgreen advises starting around the same time each evening, giving the last meal at least three hours before bed and moving lively play to earlier in the evening. If you do the same things every evening, your puppy learns what to expect.

1. 1A set bedtime. Pick a time and stick to it.
2. 2Enough to do during the day. A puppy who has had a full day, with play and short, fun training sessions between naps, is much more likely to get a good night's rest, according to Dogs Trust. Plan their naps with the overview in how much sleep a puppy needs.
3. 3Last meal at least three hours before bed.
4. 4About 30 minutes of winding down. Lower your voice, dim the lights, close the curtains and sit quietly together.
5. 5Last toilet trip. Take them outside just before bed, wait until they pee and praise them calmly.
6. 6Something to chew. Settle them in their spot with a chew toy. Once they're playing quietly with it, you can leave them be.

Breeders usually give you something that smells of the mother, such as a blanket. Put it in their sleeping spot every night. Even better: take a blanket of your own on your last visit to the breeder, leave it in the litter and take it home again at pick-up.

What do you do when your puppy cries on the first night?

Go to them. Crying or barking in the first nights is completely normal, according to the PDSA, and comforting helps: a scared puppy who is ignored feels isolated and becomes even more frightened. Check first whether they need to pee. If not, calmly reassure them. That way they learn you are there when they need you.

1. 1Go calmly. No big greeting, no bright light.
2. 2Toilet first. Take them out quietly and without fuss: no chatting, no playing. If they pee, praise them gently and put them straight back to bed.
3. 3Doesn't need to go? Reassure them. A hand near their crate or a gentle stroke. With you calmly there, they settle again more easily.
4. 4Still upset? Some puppies settle faster if you sleep on the floor next to their crate for the first night or two.

Won't they learn that crying pays off?

You hear that worry a lot, and some sites advise never opening the crate while your puppy whines. The PDSA says the opposite: don't worry about teaching them that crying gets attention. Leaving them to cry, even if they seem to settle after a while, can cause a lot more stress. Woodgreen is just as clear: ignoring them creates stress and makes settling harder.

And LICG? In its step-by-step crate training it says not to let a barking dog out straight away, or they learn that barking works. The same page also says that barking or whining often means they were left in longer than they can cope with, and that a puppy in real panic should not be left in the crate. So at night, with a puppy who has just left their litter, choose reassurance.

How often does a puppy need to go out at night?

Expect at least once a night. According to Woodgreen, a puppy under 12 weeks will probably need a toilet trip at least once during the night, and for the first weeks you will be up once, maybe twice a night. A young puppy physically cannot hold their bladder all night. LICG even mentions several times a night.

Set an alarm and check whether your puppy is awake and unsettled; then they don't have to cry first. Keep it short and boring: no lights, no play, no fuss. Out, pee, back to bed.

Get ready for the night

• Lead, collar or harness and your shoes by the door. Put the collar on at the door, not in the crate.
• A small torch for outside; indoors the lights stay off.
• A fixed toilet spot as close to the front door as possible. If you live in a flat, carry them down.
• Poo bags and kitchen roll for an accident on the way.

No garden? Until your puppy is fully vaccinated, the PDSA advises keeping them to places where no other unvaccinated dogs have been. Choose a spot close to home where as few dogs as possible go, and ask your vet which spot in your neighbourhood is sensible.

Most puppies sleep through the night by around 16 weeks, but every puppy is different. Larger breeds tend to get bladder control sooner than small ones. Phasing out the night trips is covered in puppy house training.

What do the first 72 hours with your puppy look like?

Quiet, simple and predictable. Your puppy doesn't need to get to know the whole house, the family and the neighbourhood in three days. Below is our own day plan, based on advice from the PDSA, Woodgreen and LICG. Treat it as a guide, not a timetable that has to be right to the minute.

Day one: arrival

• When you get home, go to the spot where they're allowed to pee first, especially after a long drive. Praise them when they go there.
• Then show them their own space: their bed, their food and their water. Don't let them roam the whole house freely yet; show them the rooms one at a time, with you there.
• Keep the house calm and have no visitors for the first few days.
• Keep to the feeding times they're used to. The breeder or rescue knows when, what and how much they eat.
• Keep play short and let them sleep a lot. Some puppies sleep as much as 18 to 20 hours a day.

The first night

Sleep in the same room, follow the evening routine above and go to them when they cry. How long it takes before they sleep calmly alone differs from puppy to puppy. So let your puppy set the pace.

Days two and three: the same rhythm

• The same times for eating, peeing, play and sleep. Take them out after meals and after every nap: that's when they need it most.
• Don't leave them alone for long in the first few days.
• Once they feel a little at home, practise very short moments alone in the room: step out, and come back after a few seconds. Building it up from there is covered in dog home alone.
• Spend plenty of time with them, so they learn they can be happy and safe around you.

After that, the real settling in only begins. For the weeks after, there is our plan for the first 30 days with a new dog.

When can your puppy sleep alone?

Once they sleep calmly with you nearby, and even then step by step. How you go on depends on the approach from the table. If their bed started in your bedroom, you move their crate. If you sleep near their permanent spot, you move your own temporary bed. It might take a few weeks.

Move a little further each time: every night, or every few nights. If it goes well, carry on. If they struggle, stay a few nights at the distance they can cope with. A gradual approach prevents setbacks.

Going back to work in a few weeks? Start short moments alone in good time. LICG warns that you can't teach a puppy in two weeks to stay alone for half days, and recommends a sitter if you have to be away longer than they've learned to cope with. Our dog daycare is for dogs from around half a year old; for a younger puppy, we'll talk about what's possible.

Frequently asked questions about a puppy's first night